George Santos left Congress in style.
Expelled from the House, our duplicitous diva marched down the Capitol steps in his oversized overcoat, but not before giving one final read.
“Why would I want to stay here?” he said post-vote. “To hell with this place!”
How about we take this to the next level?
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On December 1, the U.S. Congress outlawed being fierce. What can we say?
But Santos’ moment at the top didn’t last very long. The disgraced ex-pol soon resorted to recording embarrassing cameos.
His nadir came when he recorded a special shoutout to a furry.
“Hey, Heath. George Santos here. I’m so proud of you for coming out as a furry, and I just wanted to tell you that your friends and family all accept you,” he said. “They all love you, beaver-puss.”
For that brilliance, Santos quickly started outpacing his Congressional salary. (No word on whether he’s still at that pace, but we would bet not!)
But prior to leaving the capital, and diving into his new career as the butt of the joke, Santos treated himself to one more big night out. Records show the serial liar used $1,300 in campaign cash at the Capitol Club three days after he was kicked out of Congress.
Overall, his campaign spent $2,200 at the private Republican social club in the fourth quarter. Our queen loves to celebrate infamy! The New York Post reports that Santos billed his donors for the party.
Probably paid for with a stolen credit card
— Human (@kcpoehl) January 31, 2024
Santos’ GOP donors were taken for quite the ride. In addition to a 23-count federal indictment, he’s accused of using the stolen funds to pay for Botox, Sephora, and… OnlyFans.
In other words, Santos took money from unsuspecting Republicans and used it to…pay for gay sex workers and makeup! Honey, that would be the heist of the century, if only Santos weren’t so odious.
Forever aggrieved, Santis accused the Post–you know, Rupert Murdoch’s infamously liberal tabloid–of trying to smear him.
“The @nypost wrote this story trying to smear me some more,” he posted.
Santos claims the Capitol Club bills his account at the beginning of each month; and thus, the expenses in question actually happened in November. You know, only when he was on the verge of being expelled.
I guess you gotta enjoy the good life while you can, right?
Out of office, Santos only reappears in the public eye for court appearances. He was spotted entering federal court last week, wearing Prada loafers. We can’t help but wonder if he wore the same shoes on his swanky night out at the Captiol Hill Club?
When asked about his employment status, he declined to divulge details. “Nothing I want to report,” he said.
Why get a job when you have donors??? Our loathsome gay could already be off to his next scheme!