D*nald Tr*mp’s inauguration is already a humiliating bleep-show

D*nald Tr*mp’s inauguration is already a humiliating bleep-show

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Donald Trump

Nothing can stop the MAGA movement. That is, except for a little chilly weather!

D*nald Tr*mp announced today his inauguration Monday will be held indoors, with an expected high temp of 23 degrees in D.C. The last inauguration to be held inside was Ronald Reagan’s second in 1985. That day, the temperature at noon was only 7 degrees, and the morning low 4 degrees below zero.

While 23 degrees is cold, it’s not necessarily frigid. Gays in Chicago gallivant around Northalsted all winter long in nothing but crop tops and Santa speedos. Surely, Tr*mp and his oversized black overcoat can withstand a little arctic air!

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But nope, the aspiring strongman will be inside the Capitol Rotunda. He claims he doesn’t want to see “people hurt, or injured, in any way.”

While that’s a nice sentiment, Tr*mp’s concern about how his supporters will fare in adverse conditions seems to be new. He’s never hesitated to hold rallies in the sweltering summer heat, leading to dozens of hospitals last year alone.

The next time somebody gets hospitalized for standing outside with proper winter attire in 23-degree weather, let us know! It sounds like Trump, a 78-year-old Florida resident, just doesn’t want to be outside in the cold.

Snowflake!

The last time a presidential inauguration was held in sub-freezing temps was 2009, when Barack Obama was sworn into office for his first term. Not only were the ceremonies held outdoors, but 1.8 million people attended.

Famously, Tr*mp lied about his [crowd] size in 2017, and sent out his chief propagandist, Sean Spicer, to falsely declare it was the “largest crows to ever witness an inauguration, period.”

But with Tr*mp retreating into the Rotunda, there will be no need for him or his minions to lie. Seating is very limited… Reagan only invited 96 people for his inauguration in ’85.

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With 435 House members alone, there won’t be nearly enough space for congressmen, senators, Cabinet officials, donors, Supreme Court justices or any special guests. To state the obvious, the MAGA heads who shelled out thousands so they could be in D.C. for the big day will be shut out, too.

Maybe they can buy a Tr*mp gold chain or personalized silver bar ($2,340) to alleviate their sorrows.

Sad!

Two people who won’t be disappointed are Michelle Obama and Nancy Pelosi. They opted out of attending this bleep-show before the venue was changed.

The image of Tr*mp packing up and heading inside at the slightest inclination of cold weather is too perfect. We would expect nothing less from a privileged elitist whose father gave him a $60 million loan.

Too bad his fans will be left in the cold. Though in their defense, they’re used to it!

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