Being the spouse of a politician comes with challenges others don’t face. Lawmakers often work long, unsociable hours.
During election season, politicians will be extra busy, knocking on doors or participating in events to ensure election victory. Spouses may be expected to take part in events to show support for their other half (just ask Melania Trump!).
Being a same-sex spouse may come with additional challenges. There’s the public and press interest in your private life and the risk of unwanted homophobia.
How about we take this to the next level?
Subscribe to our newsletter for a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
As we hurtle toward the November election, spare a thought for the families of all our elected public servants.
Just a couple of decades ago, you could count the number of out-gay lawmakers at the state and federal levels on your hands. That’s all changed, according to The Victory Fund, which donates money to queer politicians, over 200 out LGBTQ+ candidates won their elections in 2023. That’s a higher number than any other midterm election.
Below are noted figures who have made it to DC, along with their other halves.
Pete and Chasten Buttigieg
Unlike the others mentioned below, Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg is not an elected official. He was appointed to his cabinet post by President Joe Biden. He’s considered a potential Vice Presidential pick by Kamala Harris. Even if that position goes to someone else, should Harris win re-election, Buttigieg will likely continue to enjoy a high-profile position in the cabinet.
Buttigieg met his husband Chasten via a dating app in August 2015. They became engaged in 2017 and married a year later. They are now dads to twins through adoption.
Jared Polis and Marlon Reis
Polis became the first out-gay man elected to Congress in 2009, representing Colorado’s 2nd District. Other gay Reps to come out before him had done so after their election. After his run as a Rep. Polis assumed the role of Governor of Colorado in 2019. He married his longtime partner, Marlon Reis, in a small Jewish ceremony at a synagogue in Boulder in September 2021.
Robert Garcia and Matthew Mendez
Robert Garcia joined the US House of Representatives in January 2023. A Democrat, he represents California’s 42nd congressional district. Before this, he was the Mayor of Long Beach. He’s become known for his sassy use of social media and eye-catching LGBTQ advocacy (including a tribute speech to RuPaul on the floor of the house).
Garcia married his longtime boyfriend, California State University, Long Beach professor Matthew Mendez, in December 2018.
Becca Balint and Elizabeth R. Wohl
Balint represents Vermont’s at-large district in the US House. She took office in 2023. Before this, the 56-year-old held office in the Vermont Senate. She is married to attorney and opera singer Elizabeth R. Wohl. The women are parents to two children, Abe, 15, and Sarah, 12.
Chris Pappas and Vann Bentley
Vann and I are excited to share that we’re married!
We feel so fortunate to have found each other and to be building our life together, and we’re grateful for the love and support of family and friends. pic.twitter.com/MILyu95FWZ
— Chris Pappas (@ChrisPappasNH) February 20, 2023
Democrat Chris Pappas was elected to the US House to represent New Hampshire’s 1st congressional district in 2019. He’s the first out-gay man to represent New Hampshire in Congress.
Pappas became engaged to partner Vann Bentley in December 2021. In February 2023, he revealed on X (then Twitter), that they had married.
“Vann and I are excited to share that we’re married!” he said. “We feel so fortunate to have found each other and to be building our life together, and we’re grateful for the love and support of family and friends.”
Angie Craig and Cheryl Greene
Angie Craig is a member of the Democratic–Farmer–Labor Party (DFL). She has served as the US representative from Minnesota’s 2nd congressional district since 2019. She was the first out-lesbian mom to serve in Congress.
Craig married her partner, Cheryl Greene, in 2008. The couple have four sons, who were all teenagers during Craig’s first run for Congress in 2016 (she lost that year but won in 2018).
Laphonza Butler and Neneki Lee
When long-serving California senator Dianne Feinstein died in 2023, Governor Gavin Newsom chose labor union official Laphonza Butler to fill her seat. At the time, Butler was also the President of the political action committee Emily’s List, which works to elect Democratic women.
Butler became only the third Black woman to ever serve in the Senate, and the first out LGBTQ person to represent California in the chamber. She is not running for re-election this November.
Butler and wife Neneki share a daughter, Nylah.
All of the above are Democrats. There are other queer Democrats in Congress but some are single and others keep their partners well out of the spotlight. We would have liked to include some Republicans in the list but the only out-gay Republican elected to Congress was George Santos in 2022, and he was kicked out last December.
Related*
Help make sure LGBTQ+ stories are being told…
We can’t rely on mainstream media to tell our stories. That’s why we don’t lock Queerty articles behind a paywall. Will you support our mission with a contribution today?
Cancel anytime · Proudly LGBTQ+ owned and operated