When Ron “Don’t Say Gay” DeSantis launched his now-futile presidential campaign, the gay-hating Florida governor positioned himself as the future of the Republican Party.
Now, he’s completely lost, and hoping for second place!
Trailing Donald Trump by 30 points in Iowa, DeSantis is aggressively courting evangelicals, touting his extreme anti-LGBTQ+ record and six-week abortion ban. On social issues, he’s running to the right of the disgraced ex-president.
In other words, DeSantis is occupying the Ted Cruz lane. But the saddest part is, he won’t be nearly as successful.
Though Trump throttled Cruz in the primary, the unctuous senator did ultimately win Iowa.
DeSantis is on track to get blown out in the Hawkeye State. So his campaign is adjusting its message accordingly.
“A strong second-place showing gives us an opportunity to go in[to] New Hampshire and show success,” a DeSantis official told Politico earlier this month.
That’s right: the head of DeSantis’ Super PAC is begging donors for $50 million…so they can finish in a “strong second place.”
“I don’t think there’s a single state we have to win,” said the DeSantis official.
That’s not usually how it works, but OK!
Heaping with desperation, Casey DeSantis, otherwise known as “America’s Karen,” recently tweeted out a broad missive filled with all the buzzwords.
Unfortunately, it also lacked meaning.
Like any losing candidate, DeSantis is now plagued with headlines about infighting staff members. But the dysfunction under Meatball Ron’s watch seems messier than usual.
For example: the head of DeSantis’ all-powerful Super PAC, Don’t Back Down, is also pushing legalized marijuana in Florida. Jeff Roe’s firms have been paid nearly $29 million by a group pushing a ballot question that would legalize weed in the Sunshine State, Politico reports.
DeSantis, a staunch opponent of drugs, says recreational marijuana is a “real problem.”
Apparently, unless his most trusted advisor is championing it.
Almost like he doesn’t care where the money comes from as long as it gets to him.
— Chargé d’Affaires (@BrandiAtkinson) September 19, 2023
Reason number x00,000 as to why Ron DeSantis will never be President.
— Consultant ✨ (@Lipstay) September 19, 2023
Why doesn’t Ron understand that the majority of the electorate doesn’t care what he wants?
— Poor Pepe (@daverichards_de) September 19, 2023
I would pay so much money to watch Ron get high. The weird faces he would make… pic.twitter.com/A66nHzMuD2
— Martin Kendell (@burnabymartin) September 19, 2023
Of course, no DeSantis news cycle would be complete without a story about his strange personality! In a new book about Fox News, the journalist Michael Wolff alleges the anti-social politician kicked Tucker Carlson‘s dog during an awkward lunch.
While Wolff is a bit of a fabulist, the scenario is possible to imagine. DeSantis, after all, once chided a young child for enjoying an icee (along with a laundry list of social faux pas).
Bizarre
— Kristin Mason (@kristinmason81) September 20, 2023
Earlier this week, John Fetterman also dunked on DeSantis when he chided his professional attire.
Still three months away from Iowa, DeSantis’ campaign is already downplaying the importance of winning, while playing to an increasingly small part of the electorate.
“Bizarre” indeed.