Conrad Ricamora on Margaret Cho, the “painfully” relatable ‘How To Die Alone’ & more queer culture-shifters

Conrad Ricamora on Margaret Cho, the “painfully” relatable ‘How To Die Alone’ & more queer culture-shifters

You are currently viewing Conrad Ricamora on Margaret Cho, the “painfully” relatable ‘How To Die Alone’ & more queer culture-shifters
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Conrad Ricamora knows a thing or two about queer history. He is, after all, currently playing Abraham Lincoln—our gayest president—in Cole Escola’s gonzo Broadway sensation Oh, Mary!

So what does he think belongs in the history books one day? What recent LGBTQ+ pop culture does he want queer generations to remember for years and years to come?

In The Queer Time Capsule, we ask our our favorite LGBTQ+ icons to hand select five items from the culture that they feel are worthy of being preserved for the future, and Ricamora is the latest to make his picks.

A star of stage and screen, Ricamora’s credits include the fabulous gay rom-com Fire Island, medical procedural The Resident, and Broadway musicals like The King And I and Here Lies Love. But most audiences likely first met him on the addictive drama How To Get Away With Murder, where he played the savvy yet self-conscious tech whiz Oliver.

His latest role is on Hulu’s sharply funny and brutally honest How To Die Alone, created by and starring Natasha Rothwell, about an airline employee who begins to question her life choices after a brush with death. Ricamora plays Rory, the supposed gay “bestie” to Rothwell’s Mel, who he sees as the complete opposite of someone like How To Get Away With Murder‘s buttoned-up Oliver:

“[Rory] has many, many opinions and says all of them. Being able to play somebody that’s messy was such a treat after six years of Murder,” the actor shares with Queerty. “And I relate to him so painfully much from my 20s and 30s—being lost in my personal life, in my career life, and making bad decisions all in an effort to try to find some direction and sense of belonging in the world.”

Taking a quick break from Oh, Mary! to attend the premiere of How To Die Alone in LA, Ricamora spoke with Queerty about some of the pop culture that helped him find his own “sense of belonging in the world,” from his former co-star Margaret Cho to the very Hulu comedy series you can watch him on right now.

But what else deserves a place in our Queer Time Capsule? Conrad Ricamora makes the case for 5 timeless pieces of queer culture below:

1. The Real World: New York City (Season 1)

“I remember, in the ’90s, watching the very, very first Real World—and I was living in Niceville, Florida, which is only 30 minutes from Alabama, so it was not great. I didn’t even think it was possible to be gay, and then all fo a sudden I saw Norman on The Real World and I was like, ‘Ah, oh my god—there are people like me out there! And there’s a place called New York City, and you’re allowed to be whoever you want to be there.’ That was a huge moment for me, watching that show.”

2. Björk, Debut

“I would also put Björk’s first [adult] album in the time capsule. Like, ‘Human Behavoir’? When that video came out and I got her—I mean, I’m dating myself, but it was a casette tape that I got. And my family was like, ‘What is this?’ And I was like, ‘Shut up, she’s brilliant.’ I love it so much. She was just weird, and the fact that she was able to be different, and that it somehow made sense to me, even if it didn’t make sense to anyone else in my family. I was like, ‘I don’t care! I’m listening to it.’”

3. Margaret Cho, I’m the One That I Want

“Margaret Cho’s first real stand-up special—I remember I had just started doing theater, and I was doing Summer Stock in Charlotte, NC, and I made everybody sit around in watch it. It was the first time that I felt very seen in that way, as an Asian-American.”

4. Fire Island

“I think Fire Island belongs in there. It’s a huge moment, not just for me but for queer people. When we were shooting that, it took me took weeks to go up to [Margaret Cho,] I was very professional. Then finally I was like, ‘Margaret, I’m just going to say this—you get this all the time, but: Thank you for everything.’ She is so important, she was so seminal for all of us.”

5. How To Die Alone

“I mean, how often do you get to see a story focused on a friendship between a fat, Black woman and a gay, Asian man? And I think there’s something so beautiful about that. I felt immediately in touch [with it,] that it represented my experiences: In my 20s and 30s, with my girlfriends and finding solace in them. Especially with Rory being an Asian boy adopted by an Upper East Side white, rich family—I don’t think he’d ever found a sense of belonging until he met [Rothwell’s] Mel. And it’s the same with Mel, being a fat, Black, broke woman in this world that’s not necessarily accepting to people like Mel. And so they found solace in each other!

And, you know, that can only get you so far in life. When you’re trying to become the person that you want to become, a lot of times you have to break away from—or create distance, or create brutal honesty with—the friends you have in your life, and that can be really painful. Especially in the queer community, we have this notion of ‘chosen family,’ where you’re just so grateful to be accepted, and when we grow from that group, the question of whether you can grow together or apart is a part of all of our lives. So I’m excited to be able to show that on screen.”

The first four episodes of How To Die Alone are now streaming on Hulu, with new episodes dropping weekly on Fridays.

Image Credit: ‘How To Die Alone,’ Hulu/Onyx


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